If you didn’t read Monday’s post you should start there. This is the fifth post in a series called: <a href="../sex1">Why Are Christians Waiting for Marriage for Sex?</a>
<h3><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-4853" style="border: 1px solid black;margin: 1px 5px" src="http://www.allyspotts.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Screen-shot-2011-10-14-at-1.06.33-AM-300x273.png" alt="" width="300" height="273" />Do you have any idea how valuable you are? I don’t think you do.</h3>
If I had known how valuable I was I wouldn’t have wasted so many years offering myself for such a cheap price to so many undeserving men.

<em>No wonder I didn’t feel valuable.</em>

No wonder men didn’t see the value I was desperate for them to see in me. Value is like a mirror. The way I see myself in the mirror impacts the way I present myself. The way I present myself impacts how I'm perceived. When I feel less than valuable I project myself as less than valuable and that is how I am received.

<strong>It's a vicious cycle.</strong>

Strong physical boundaries in relationship speak to your value. They speak the message that you want others to hear. You are worth more than a movie ticket or a cup of coffee or a couple of dinners out. You are not that easily accessible. It takes more than that.
<h4>Let your physical boundaries speak to the value you place on your sexuality.</h4>
Thank goodness for people in my life who helped speak to my value. We need people who hold up a mirror and say, "Look! This is what you really look like! Remember how valuable you are?" I have a ton of people like that. Who does that for you in your life?

People who <em>value</em> you love you not because of the things you do or what you offer them but just because you are you. They want what is good for you even if it isn't good for them.

<strong>I don’t have to prove earn my value or prove my value to these people. I am valuable. I just am.</strong>

What would happen if you eliminated all the people from your life who care more about what you have to offer them than they do about your well-being? What would happen if you stopped caving in to them?

I spent years of my life searching for security, significance and belonging in the wrong places. It was like looking in a broken mirror. I didn’t realize that I already had all of the things I was trying to find.

<em>I needed someone to hold up a mirror to show me who I really was. I had those things. I was valuable. I am.</em>

<strong>You will not find the self-value you are looking for in a physical relationship. I know it feels like you will but you won't. You'll feel less valued than you did when you were alone.
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Do you believe me?

Do you know how much value you have?