I loved reading your post.  I too have been on a similar journey of having my religious Christianity dismantled as well.  It is painful, disillusioning and very lonely watching your institutionalised faith wash away.  But then a new faith starts to grow.  This faith seeks Jesus the man, Jesus the divine.  It understands his co-equality and co-eternal nature, being one with the Father.  This faith takes us from the church's four walls and into the world.  Many churched folk dont understand how we could leave the church, but following Jesus is counter-cultural (including counter-church-cultural), raw and wild.  We can not tame Jesus, but we can learn to love others like He does.  Great post!