<strong><em>R:</em></strong> <em>I was interested about your take on how the BDSM community was angry at the book. You said, “The whole point is that both parties are supposed to enjoy the act itself.” (Loc. 956, Kindle). Apparently, James got the BDSM part wrong as well. Have you had members of the BDSM community agree with you on this point?</em>

<strong><em>C: </em></strong>Actually, I have – both in public discussion, and in private conversations. The main themes I’ve seen are as follows:

-          BDSM sex (like all consensual sex) isn’t about willfully imposing your needs and desires on another person. It’s about finding out what you both like, and then doing that together.

-          Liking BDSM isn’t a sign of damage, and isn’t something that needs fixing. It’s just a preference. Some people like stamp-collecting, some people like gourmet cooking, some people like tying each other up during sex. As long as everyone’s happy, what’s the problem?

-          Liking BDSM has nothing to do with being abusive towards your spouse. Christian telling Ana where she can go, who she can see, how she can dress, what she can eat, whether she can go to work, what she does with her money and what form of contraceptive she can use because he likes BDSM. He tells Ana where she can go, who she can see, how she can dress, what she can eat, whether she can go to work, what she does with her money and what form of contraceptive she can use because he is abusive…and, co-incidentally, he likes BDSM.

<strong><em>R: </em></strong>One of the reactions that came from this book was that women were engaging their husbands more intimately after they read the book. It’s an argument, in a way, that the book must be having some sort of positive effect and can’t be “<em>all bad</em>.” I have all types of theories about this, but I’m wondering if it is a positive, negative or neutral response to reading it. Thoughts?

<em><strong>C: </strong></em>If couples really are having better, more loving sex and happier marriages as a result of reading “<em>Fifty Shades</em>”, then <a href="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/usashades.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-8657" alt="usashades" src="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/usashades-300x220.jpg" width="300" height="220" /></a>fair play to them. And if I’m honest, it probably contributed to my marital happiness as well. Mainly by making me think, “<em>Thank goodness my husband is absolutely nothing like Christian Grey</em>.”

Okay, being serious; I’m kind of suspicious about this idea. I’ve had a lot of comments from a lot of people about my “<em>Lighter Shades</em>” series, ranging from “<em>You go, sister</em>” to “<em>You will spend eternity in Hell, stewing in a boiling pot of your own jealous bile</em>”. I’ve never, ever had anyone say to me, “<em>I love this book because it improved my sex life with my spouse</em>”. Maybe I just attract the wrong sort of reader, I don’t know…

I’m not saying that no-one in the whole world anywhere has ever read “<em>Fifty Shades</em>” and experienced better marital sex as a result. It’s sold 65 million copies world-wide. I’d be more surprised if there weren’t a few people in there who found it liberating. But whole nations of couples? Seriously? We’ve all been sexually repressed and frustrated in our marriages, from the long-ago dawn of Time right up until last year? Are we really that dumb at relating to each other?

I do wonder if this is just one of those Factoids that get invented one afternoon in an office somewhere, and then take on a bizarre life of their own. You know that urban legend that we all eat eight spiders a year because they crawl into our mouths while we sleep? Apparently that was invented by a journalist called Lisa Holst, specifically to prove that we’ll believe stuff that sounds exciting, even when it’s completely made up.

<em><strong>R:</strong></em> I liked the fact that in the information at the end, you answered questions that I’m sure people would have about you. Specifically, “<em>Are you jealous of her success?</em>” You answered, “<em>Well, what do you think?</em>” Any of us would love to be living off of the profits she will be seeing for years. But in this work, in your own creative way, you have done a lot of things: You are pointing out the need for responsible writing, you protect the classics, you show a need for women to respect themselves, and more. What has been the most important thing for you in writing these three books?

<strong><em>C: </em></strong>There’s definitely a perception out in the world that Feminist is the opposite of Funny. So I definitely hope I’ve managed to write some books which are both funny and feminist in their finished form.

<strong><em><a href="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/writing.gif"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-8658" style="margin-left: 6px;margin-right: 6px" alt="writing" src="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/writing.gif" width="254" height="254" /></a>R:</em></strong> E. L. James recently announced that she was working on a book about writing. After your careful examination of her work, what do you think she could offer to the writers of the world?

<strong><em>C:</em></strong> The comforting thought that if it can happen to her, it can happen to any of us.

<strong><em>R:</em></strong> What would you suggest to an aspiring fiction writer? Are there any classes to take, works to read, or helpful tips?

<strong><em>C:</em></strong> Okay, this will be very, very subjective because this is just what’s worked for me! But here are my top five tips:

1.      <strong>Find the right notebook</strong>

This is a very important stage of the writing process. Go into one of those luxury stationers filled with gorgeous notebooks of every imaginable size and design. Indulge yourself for as long as you feel you need in swooning over their sheer papery loveliness. Spend some time choosing the notebook you love the most, because it’s a wonderful object that makes your heart beat faster just looking at it.

Then put it back on the shelf, walk away from it and go and buy the cheapest, tattiest notebook you can find. This is the notebook you will actually use to work in. Writing is a messy, scribbly process, and if you buy the gorgeous notebook, you’ll never actually use it to write in because you won’t want to pollute its loveliness with your scribbled-out notes and terrible handwriting. Beautiful stationery is the hidden enemy of creativity.

2.    <strong>  Allocate time to actually write.</strong>

Time is a very democratic resource. We all get exactly the same amount of it - twenty-four hours in every day. Time is also a very well-used resource. We all use exactly the same amount of it – twenty-four hours each day.

To start writing, you have to stop doing something else. Play less. Work less. Sleep less. Eat less. Go out less. Stay in less. Something has to give.

3.      Accept that writing is often not fun

There will be days when every word you write will suck beyond all explanation. Words will not be your friends. Your characters will be annoying and wooden. Their dialogue will not sparkle. Your plot will meander into an implausible cul-de-sac. You will wonder why you’re bothering. This happens to everyone – you, me, Stephen King, Jacqueline Susann, Iris Murdoch, J K Rowling, everyone. Write anyway. Write even though you don’t feel like it. Keep going. The only way out is through.

4.      <strong>Editing is what makes the difference</strong>

Your first draft will probably be a train-wreck. That’s okay, it’s supposed to be. Go through at least three times – once with a hatchet, once with a chisel and once with a scalpel. When every word you cut causes you actual physical pain, you’re probably about half-way there.

Also, never compare your first draft to anyone else’s finished work (even your own finished work).

5.      <strong>Ignore every word I’ve said</strong>

The only thing that matters is that you actually write. Whatever works for you at getting the words out of your head and onto paper is the right way.

<strong><em>R:</em></strong> Just for kicks, what are some of your favorite works of literature?

<em><strong>C:</strong></em>  Goodness, where do I start? I can probably manage a Top Ten, as long as I can cheat and have a couple of anthologies and omnibus editions…

Jane Austen’s collected works (especially Mansfield Park), The Grimm brothers’ Fairy Tales collection, The Night Watch sequence from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series, Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier, The Shining by Stephen King, Middlemarch by George Eliot, Vanity Fair by William Thackeray, Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, by some mysterious Anglo-Saxon genius, Villette by Charlotte Bronte, The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter

Now I feel like a traitor to all the other books I love that I haven’t included – Peyton Place and Valley of the Dolls and Carrie and Morte d’Arthur and Hitchhikers and The Canterbury Tales and Mennonite in a Little Black Dress…oh dear. What a difficult question. I have to move on now or I’ll lose my mind!

And of course, it goes without saying that I am really, really looking forward to E L James’s book on the subject.<a href="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/adams.png"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-8659" alt="adams" src="http://provoketive.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/adams.png" width="177" height="169" /></a>

<em><strong>R:</strong></em> Do you have any favorite books on writing? (for instance, I love Stephen King’s, “On Writing.”)

<strong><em>C:</em></strong> I love Stephen King’s On Writing – it’s wise and funny and real and honest, and I really admire his approach to it as a serious profession. I also rather like Douglas Adams’ occasional notes in The Salmon of Doubt (“<em>I like deadlines…I love the whooshing noise they make as they rush by</em>”).

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Cassandra Parkin has a Master’s degree in English Literature from York University, and has been writing fiction all her life – mostly as Christmas and birthday presents for friends and family. She is married with two children, has so far resisted her clear genetic destiny to become a mad old cat lady, and lives in a small but perfectly formed village in East Yorkshire.  You can also follow Cassandra on Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/cassandrajaneuk">@cassandrajaneuk </a>and read her blog at <a href="http://www.cassandraparkin.wordpress.com">www.cassandraparkin.wordpress.com</a>. You will definitely be doing yourself a favor by reading any of her books, so take time to check them out.

Ray Carroll is author of “<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Fallen-Pastor-Finding-Restoration-Broken/dp/0615567096/ref=tmm_pap_title_0?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1347593993&amp;sr=8-1">Fallen Pastor: Finding Restoration in a Broken World.</a>” He blogs regularly at <a href="http://www.fallenpastor.com">www.fallenpastor.com</a>.

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