Kristen, you write: "if we continue to follow the leading of the Spirit, then both the husband and the wife can be co-spiritual leaders of their homes, leading the family side by side, each in his or her own area of strength– in mutual submission according to Eph. 5:21." 

This idea is the thesis of my essay. My husband and I <em>are</em> doing this, and it's working. 

I'm not sure how the miscommunication occurred, but I appreciate your contribution of the Ephesians passage and the idea of Christ initiating/ordaining a new paradigm. Yes, yes, yes, indeed.